Two extremes of a spectrum – The young and the Old…..

India in the last few decades has emerged as a very mobile society of working women and busy homes. It favors a youth culture, which caters to the youthful energy of people in their prime. Consequently, those who live at the extreme spectrums of society such as old dependent parents, parents-in-law may be looked upon as a burden and find themselves placed in the care of day nurseries or homes for the aged.

At one end of the spectrum we have the young. After having a child a woman may want to return to work to help supplement the family income. Men do not object to working partners as it helps maintain an upwardly mobile lifestyle. Working women often do not have the convenience of an extended family where the mother-in-law / father-in-law can take care of young children until their parents returns from the office or workplace. As a result pre-school children are often placed in day care centers where they are supervised by trained adults and engaged in a variety of planned activities, arts and crafts and games. While in these centers children are socialized to get along with others their own age and to express themselves creatively through art and music. Parents, while busy at work are relieved that her child is in the good, supervised care of professional adults. It is a business transaction. They pay the caretakers and in return, their children are taken care of. There are no strings attached and they need not make any adjustments at home or in their lifestyle, which they would have to if they had old parents / in-laws living with them.

What they lack is the unconditional love from grand-parents, empathy towards older people and an skill sets that can only be learnt from interaction with elders in the family.

At the other end of the age spectrum are the elderly who also need special and professional care. As the life span if individuals increases in industrialized / developing countries, people now can live well into their late seventh and eighth decades. With good health and monetary independence, many seniors choose to lead an independent life. Some of these elderly people who have no children or surviving spouse have to choose an independent life as they have no choice.

Freedom is the essence of life and the impulse and need to go on leading an independent life, making their own decisions and choosing their own lifestyle is seen as the most essential element for many seniors.
A decent life savings in the bank, helps most old citizens tide through their old age smoothly. Seniors often find that they can no longer take care of themselves. Unfortunately, it is only when ailments, sickness and illness hinder their regular routine , that seniors become dependants. It is a very difficult decision they have to make out of desperation. When their free and independent lives are suddenly under the control of others who treat them with veiled impatience and blatant disregard, their self esteem takes a big knock.

Constant medical care, treatments, check-ups become a routine part of life, which is neither understood as critical or significant by the younger generation who act as caretakers.

Many seniors may be alone and have no family of their own to care for them. In many cases the family of the aged, for a variety of reasons may no longer be able to provide them with the special and professional attention they need.


Consequently, senior citizen homes have developed to serve as centers where the older members of society can spend their declining years in relative comfort while being cared for by people especially trained to deal with the unique problems of the aged.


There is, however, a difference between a senior citizen's residence or retirement home and a nursing home which goes beyond a mere euphemism. In a retirement village such as Melur Meadows, an elderly persons lead a life of pride and dignity. They have not been forced to take accommodation here, rather, this is a place that is sought after by many in the dusk of their lives. A place where peace and harmony co-exist. A place where there are no restrictions. A senior is treated with all the respect and dignity that they deserve. And most important of all, they have the freedom to choose to live life at their own terms.



Melur Meadows provides excellent opportunities to its residents to take up any hobby they desire and to pursue it at their own pace. Be it music, yoga, pottery, dance, cooking, gardening – just about anything !. A special attraction is the opportunity to do community service by way of spreading education or any form of skill or art to the people and children in the nearby villages. Even reading out stories in Tamil to the children/ village folk could serve as an awareness campaign to spread news regarding various important issues.


In a nursing home the occupant may be totally at the mercy and kindness of the staff. They may not be able to feed themselves and may be confined to a wheelchair. In extreme situations they may not be able to recognize those they love. In Melur Meadows, we do have a provision for assisted living, wherein, the management, with is close tie-up with the reputed KPS Hospital, Mettupalayam, can help identify a live-in nurse for round the clock care or our resident nurse at the village will provide her services on call.

In a community, and life in a village like setting, people interact closely and a strong bond of kinship is formed. People from different backgrounds, age groups and professions reside in the village, giving rise to a healthy mixture of culture, age groups, and activities. Visit www.melurmeadows.com for all details.

Whichever part of the spectrum you may belong, do pass on the good message to elders and young alike so that they may experience some of the good things in life.

Role of a father in child rearing..

We often hear of mother's indispensible role in bringing up children. It is true and a mother definitely is indispensible ! She is after all the creator ! So what are father’s there for?

Fathers bring a unique perspective and special strength to raising children. Fathers lay the foundation stone in nurturing and shaping the personality and character of children. Some men have natural fatherly instincts, while sometimes it may have to be cultivated. But, both ways, the payoff in terms of positive effects in growing children is enormous.

A father is some one who shows how to love and be loved. It could be his brilliant smile upon spotting his child amidst hundreds of other school children, it could be his appreciative nod when he sees his child up stage in the school skit or just his crease of concern when his son has had a nightmare. A reassuring smile, a pat on the head, a hug or a swooping embrace – all leaves an indelible mark in the growing child. I don’t once recall a hug or kiss from my father, but I never once doubted his unconditional love for me and my siblings.
Not all fathers are emotive or talkative, but each has his own unique way of showing his child how much he cares. I was married young and due to my immaturity, had a lot of problems adjusting to the new environment of my husband’s family. My in-laws did not have a telephone and the inter-state calls were expensive too. I had to cope in silence. But, I drew strength from the regular letters my father and mother sent me. While my mother wrote long letters, my father’s letters would be short and affectionate with a few words of advice, tips and some old and funny anecdotes to keep me smiling. I still treasure those words of wisdom, love and affection as those are the words that gave me the strength, forbearance and maturity to tackle any situation.

For a father, a very important surrogate way to convey affection to his child is by naturally being loving and affectionate to his wife ( the mother). His concern and care for her shows the children the value of love and the strength of partnership. The open affection between husband and wife is one of the most reassuring and stabilizing elements in a growing child’s life.

Children who have grown up in a female dominated family or in the absence of a father, tend to be either lacking in emotional expression, and tend to be imbalanced in their approach to life OR they sometimes tend to be meek and submissive. Similarly, in male dominated families where women play an insignificant role, the male child tends to develop a disregard or disrespect to the females in the family , a trait he learns from the other men in the family.

The two most important things that a father can give his children are Time and Love, but these are the two things he is least lavish with. Some of the strongest memories that kids latch on to, evolve around routine moments of family life – the mere presence of the father. As a kindergarten kid, my earliest memories are of sitting contentedly beside my father while he sipped his coffee and read the news paper. I would barrage him on every word I could read and pictures I saw in the newspaper. He would never lose his temper or shoo me away. But, his absentminded “mmmMMMM – eh?” followed by a simple explanation of what the article was about was enough to keep me happy.

Fathers can be impatient and may not possess the special vision to see the world through the child’s eye. I once remember my friend Srikanth, an ex- basketball player, took his son to watch a basket-ball match that was happening in the neighbourhood. His son soon lost interest and wanted to go out. My friend was upset and regretted having brought his son along on his ‘one’ free day – Sunday ! and also missing a good match. On the ride back home, they came across a science museum. The kid wanted to go in. Srikanth was amazed to see the sparkle in his son’s eyes. The boy would go from exhibit to exhibit and call out to his dad in excitement. Those precious moments showed Srikanth a view of the world from the perspective of his 6 year old. Not to indulge in a mind-set on “this is how things should be” but, to let go and live the moment.

A father is the one who sets the limits. He may not be the only one who wears the trousers in the house, nevertheless, his authority does count as the “ultimate” in some aspects. The saying goes “ spare the rod and spoil the child” , but physical punishment is almost out of fashion amongst most families in the present days. I grew up with my two older siblings. We did our share of mischief and had terrible fights, but not on ONE occasion can I remember my dad even raising his voice to discipline us. When the occasion warranted, all he would have to do is put on a sad grimace and an unhappy nod to convey all he wanted. To displease my dad was something we would never want. He was the epitome of affection and kindness and we all vied for the “most favourite child” post in his heart. To this day, I’d like to believe that ( up until the grandchildren came) I held that post. My poor mother, in spite of all her boundless love for us, had to take on the role of the non-indulgent, stern matron for the lack of disciplining from my father’s side. It is true that most children despise a teacher who has no control – they tend to take advantage. At the same time, disciplining is a tough job as, children usually reject or dislike the one imposing discipline. But, kids have always profited by fair disciplining in the secure background of love. Fathers who are over-indulgent or who do not dare disciplining their child, will only end up punishing the child. “Punishment is something you DO TO a child”, whereas disciplining is something you DO FOR the child.” The disciplining in the form of grounding, No TV, no calls from friends or no cell phone – what ever it be, loving discipline is designed to teach a lesson.

Children who have been disciplined rather than arbitrarily being punished, have never looked back in anger at their childhood years. It is understandable that at least 75% of parents would have resorted to physical punishment at some point of time on some occasion, while rearing their children. The children of these families have been known to grow up as morally sound, mature and sensible and sensitive adults.

What is it then, about fathers ? I can’t really quantify it, but kids do recognize it. The traditional values that fathers impart, the mutual trust, truth and unconditional love are the things that set father’s apart. Despite all that mothers provide, children feel safe and secure in the presence of their fathers.

COST-EFFECTIVE HOLIDAYS FOR A LIFETIME

Summer holidays, spring holidays, winter holidays… time to go on a holiday!!! Is this the case in all our homes? When my son comes home at the beginning of the holidays with a long face and a list of exotic places that his friends’ are going for the holidays, I feel depressed. Is having a great holiday the prerogative of only a few well-to-do families?

There are two ways to spend a holiday… one is to spend a few hundred thousand on an expensive holiday, and having only memories in return. Of course, the entire family is happy!!! Is this happiness and joy going to last forever?

I did not know of any alternate way of having a good holiday until I came to know about alternative living and community living projects in scenic locations. Most of these projects are promoted as living for the retired people, but it is not only for them. Even working couples and nuclear families can invest in one of these projects, which may cost a little more than an expensive holiday. The family has a permanent holiday home to go to. And if that holiday home is located in a scenic place with lots of places to explore, it becomes even more interesting. Such holidays promote healthy living and give the children the fresh air and energy that is very much needed for their rejuvenation.

When we go on an expensive holiday we try to pack as much as possible into the holiday. We all want full value for our money. At the end of the holiday, we are more stressed, tired and feel like having another holiday to recover from the first one!!!

Holidays are meant to be enjoyed with the family. It is that time of the year when working couples get to know their children better, and their elders too. To make this time precious and valuable, investing in a community living project is a viable option… the benefit is three-fold… you invest in good property, you have a holiday home, and you spend quality time with your family….Welcome to Melur Meadows. COME AND CATCH UP WITH HAPPY LIVING.

What marriage / partnership is all about...

When we talk about successful partnership or marriage, we immediately conclude it is the fine tuned compatibility , understanding, and power sharing that aids it. It is true. But where understanding, power or work sharing is concerned – it is a purely subjective matter. Each partnership has its own way of working out the work pattern they want to follow.

We hear a lot about 50-50 marriage and the soaring success formula for a happily ever after life.. well, according to recent surveys ( survey of educated- working couple families) , men are contributing more towards household chores including child rearing and education. Still, this would not account for much. As a comparative ratio, while an average working women may be spending 25-30 hours ( or more) per week for household chores including cooking, cleaning, child-care and shopping, an average man would perhaps be contributing about 2 -4 hours per week towards lending a hand in the household activities. ( most likely shopping).

So, where does this leave us ? The above survey certainly does not depict a 50-50 sharing of chores. But, one must understand that a no two days of a married life are the same. There is constant shifts and changes of priority, time and duty. While one week, the husband may feel very grateful towards his wife who has taken out time to settle the property tax and other investment issues, resulting in his helping out with cleaning / shopping chores, the gratitude may not last long if during that week – IPL matches are being broadcast back to back. That is a time when the wife has to come to terms with the fact that when it comes to Cricket, TV comes before wife and kids.

We keep hearing about “togetherness and sharing” of activities to bring about closeness. Well, I have my reservations in this aspect. Take the example of my friend Chitra’s husband who took to bird watching. He would want her along in all his treks and trips to bird sanctuaries and resorts. In the beginning it was romantic and helped because they got to spend more time alone together. But, as this hobby grew to passion and dream, the prospect of travelling on a hot, humid day to a remote place to watch birds and note down their activities, photograph them and wait in the darkroom alongside him while the pictures “developed”.... that was asking for too much from Chitra. So, Chitra had to extricate herself from the joint activity. There have been instances of big battles in kitchen starting with something as harmless as “joint-cooking”.

This “togetherness and sharing” model flopped mostly because it did not take into account individual choices or preference. It is rigid and the expectations are extreme. It takes some people some time to realise that some activities are “Solo” activities which will be enjoyable only when done alone.

I can say that “I” man ( or rather woman) 95% of the household duties and chores. I do it with pride and joy. I am happy that the balance 5% comprises of jobs that I cannot do or do not want to do. This balance was struck after several years of marriage, several shifts and trials in duty allocation. At different points, we did different things. For instance, when I was newly married, the shopping was a joint venture. Then, when the kids came, shopping was not on my list of duties. When it was schooling time for kids, I was partly involved in shopping while I received partial help in house management, cooking etc. Finally, now that the kids are grownup, I pretty much do everything except being a tailor and barber for my husband. But, I am able to balance these chores easily because I work only part-time and have more time on my hands as against my husband who works full time – tackling a lot of problems and risks at his work place.

Power sharing is another major issue in the lives of younger generation. There was a time when the women would just say “yes dear” and do all that was expected of them. Now, women question the need or want for such an expectation. Take the example of my cousin Radha. She was expected to stay at home and care for the children. Any chore that would entail her going out was a strict “NO NO”. As the kids grew, she enrolled as a teacher in their school, it was not met with much objection as she accompanied the children to and from school. Gradually, she took up higher studies and graduated and found bigger and better jobs. This too was met with approval. Finally there came a time when her husband just wanted to relax at home while Radha took care of everything. Given time, everything changes – from a village lass to modern day top executive – this is the change that Radha’s life took. Her perseverance, patience and positive approach to life made it all possible.

The problem with 50-50 marriage model lies with the unrealistic expectations many people harbour. No two people can split a marriage in half as if it were an apple. No two people can be identical in emotions, interests and responsibilities. No two people can divide their authority and skills in some “fair” way.

Emotional equality is when both partners feel equally loved and cared for, share in family decision making and feel that they are contributing equally to the family’s well being –whether it is cooking, cleaning, shopping, child rearing (or watching TV !! ) it is this kind of 50-50 model that actually works

The power to change lies with the commonman of India.

India took pride when its name shot to international fame by way of a movie “Slumdog Millionaire”. But for the cast of characters, the music and sound mixing the rest of the crew were English. Yet, the three main pillars of strength were backed by our own talents, for which we all ever so rightly felt proud.

But once the fanfare tapered and we moved ahead, we cannot but come to terms and face the reality. We can no longer deny the condition of our country, the slums and the deplorable condition of the children – which has so realistically be portrayed in the film.

One cannot but help think regretfully of the lives of the little ones, who have been taken out of the limelight once the shoot of the film was over. In some way the children who were part of the film are a lucky lot as they did get noticed and will definitely be part of any improvement scheme that the government or NGOs think of. But what about the million other children who are deprived and shunned because they have nobody to represent them? The girl babies in city slums and remote villages that are brutally treated because there is no one to rescue them!

The solution to all this DOES NOT lie in the hands of the politicians or the government. The onus lies on US – “The common man” of India. We have the power to change what ever we set our minds to. Just as it is rightly said that one small step is the beginning of a mammoth journey, all we need to do is reach out in what ever little way we can.

Householders can take it upon themselves to ensure proper education, uniform and books are given to their maids, drivers, people who work for them. Going a step further would be to approach a small school in your locality and sponsor the poorest child on a yearly basis.

The residents of Melur meadows are gifted – I say so because we get an opportunity to do community service by visiting nearby villages and imparting free education, distributing books, taking up arts and crafts teaching for the villagers, to enhance their livelihood and think up of several schemes to light up the lives of the people who toil in the fields, grapple with poverty and are indebted and unable to repay loans.

Each year we hear of farmers and their families committing suicide due to indebtedness. We can go forward, identify these remote villages, do what is required to help out the poor on a personal basis or by forming a small active group.




By choosing to live in a gated community that offers us all the comforts and facilities, we are not closing ourselves away from the real world. By leading a worry-free life, a comfortable life, by being away from the rat-race, we find ourselves more prepared and sensitized to face up to the realities of the world around us.




I would go a step further and say that we are lucky to be able to lead a good life and also have the attitude, energy and intention to do what we can to help and reach out to the needy.



As per Buddhism…
By consciously choosing a place where peace reigns, where tranquility and calm follow us, we are able to rid ourselves of the three main traits or characteristics of low-life existence Which are Transience ,sorrow and selfishness.

Our mind and body are attuned and set to avert the following hindrances that side-track us from reaching enlightenment:
Lust, ill-will, torpor, worry and restlessness, indecisiveness and doubts. Finally the factors that will abet and speed up our self-realization and bliss are – sensitivity and mindfulness, healthy curiosity and investigation, Energy, Rapture, Tranquility, Concentration and Equanimity.

Hoping to see you all at Melur Meadows to “CATCH UP WITH HAPPY LIVING’.

What friends can do....

A normal day in the life of a commom householder, a city dwelling householder would be like this... Morning rush, travelling unscathed to work and reaching the work place in one piece and then be prepared to endure and remain sane at the most impossible demands from your boss, which even superman would find stumping going by the time given to accomplish - read as " by yesterday" and then there is always the office politics and favoritism ( the dumbo bootlicker who gets to take the foreign assignment plus all the good perks, while you remain slogging at your desk with added responsibilities ). The sad part is, the agony does not end there.. the saga continues. On your way back home, once again expertly navigating your car/bike through the maddenning crowd and jam-packed roads, you get rammed into by a bloke (who is perhaps in a hurry to meet his mates in hell). and he has the gall to probe you on "who issued you your driver’s license" or "where you originate from" and such highly blood-pressure raising questions. Many a times, you wish you hadn't taken the bait and responded back, but the natural response is to give equally biting remarks which end up in either a brawl in the middle of the road, or at least staring matches – which is a surefire recipe for causing a traffic jam and result in a 100 horns blaring at one go.
Once you’ve gotten through this scenario, you go to a grocery and as luck would have it, you are invariably way back in the queue. Big supermarkets are not the only places where people are teaming up to stock their homes with groceries and stuff, even smaller grocers are doing brisk business and the queue is milling everywhere. They say – people are losing jobs, getting paid less, are spending less, then, I wonder what most of them are doing in these shops and why are they stocking all this stuff? Well, all this done and what still remains is the mammoth duty of maintaining your cool at home when you see your teenagers room that looks like the joint efforts of a few typhoons, tornados and hurricanes... plus the blasting music and the phone that is forever stuck to your kid teenage son/daughter's ears. All this done one has to have the endurance to carry out the motions of every day chores at home and at last...no not yet over !! – You have to stay up and see the depressing news channels giving details of which millionaire got buried, which company shut down, the low and lower and lowest levels reachable by share market indexes and finally, last but not the least - You CANNOT let your spouse down by hitting the pillow right away – meaning have the energy to please your spouse too !! ( If the spouse has the energy too - that is a million dollar question !!)
In between all this, one cannot afford to forget to have the patience to deal with the moods of different family members and make sure that issues are resolved amicably, however small or baffling it may be. Take the example of your mother-in-law who wants “OUT”. Out of what -? Well, she finds the maid is sloppy and inefficient and so she wants out of having to supervise the maid. Going by the shortage of maids faced by the entire neighborhood, not to mention the scarcity of finding reliable and honest ones, you are bound to find this complaint totally unjustified and told just to spite you, still, can you dare to snub you MIL ? NEVER. You do that and you can be assured of sulking faces both from MIL and your spouse who will await an opportunity to take it out on you at the drop of a hat.

So, what does one do to unwind ? After all, duties as a spouse, father/mother, son / daughter..is never ending. So, one must take out some private time. Its called "FEEL GOOD TIME" . Who to share this time with... mom - NO, dad - NO, son/daughter - NO, Spouse - NO.

Only and just Friends - ALLOWED. FRIENDS are the best medicine.

An outing with an old friend – just window shopping or a quite lunch away from family and office friends – is Just what the doctor prescribed.
Well, if one has the luxury of taking a couple of days off, nothing like spending time with your friend(s) at a resort like Melur Meadows. Come March 2009, there will be short stay rentals available. A place so peaceful, calm, tranquil and all chores taken care of by the housekeeping staff, what more rejuvenation does one need to unwind and relax completely?
A relaxing day playing indoor games, catching up with other residents, a lazy day reading in the gardens under shady trees amidst ponds, beautifully mowed lawns, trees and only bird songs to break the silence. A fabulous menu at the kitchen and hobbies and events you can participate-in, if you feel like. A life changing holiday.


Not only cottages on short-stay rentals, but to buy and rent out too !

Check out http://www.melurmeadows.com/ for all further details. Cottages starting price as less as Rs.8 Lakhs.

How Would You Honour A Soldier?

The recent terror attacks on Bombay have left every Indian feeling exposed and vulnerable. No place is safe. Who would have imagined that a five-star hotel would bear witness to such gruesome acts of terror and fright? We're all feeling the shock of the awful attacks in Mumbai. All our hearts go out to the victims and their families. I'm writing this because I feel we need to honor their memory.

The attacks were aimed at our people, our prosperity and our peace. Their top target was something else: our unity. If these attacks cause us to turn on each other in hatred and conflict, the terrorists will have won. They know that hatred and chaos feed on division. They also know they are radical extremists, and their only hope of reaching society as a whole is by turning the rest of us against each other.

India is a country with a great heritage and she has witnessed insurgence, wave after wave, and attacks by foreign invaders in the past. After attaining independence, we have had a more or less peaceful existence barring the China-India war in the 1960s and the wars with Pakistan including the unforgettable Kargil war. In both cases, India won victoriously and once again made us Indians realize the importance of our defense forces and brought about a surge of patriotism and respect mixed with awe towards the armed forces of our great nation. Awareness spread through the press and media, first hand reports, eye-witness accounts of events and incidents, and about the brave acts of the soldiers. Common man realized that everyone owed their freedom and life to these selfless souls who pledged their lives for the safety of their country men. While we sat in our cozy living rooms and watched the events unfold on TV and radio, these brave men and women lost their lives saving the nation from infiltrators.


Becoming a soldier is the noblest duty one can take up. However, not many have the will power and dedication to take the decision and actually become one. It is those who have immense love for their nation, and concern for the lives of their countrymen who actually become soldiers – and remain soldiers till the very end.

These brave souls, who are subject to the worst of conditions on the frontlines of war, deserve more than just medals of honour. Even though it may sound controversial, I recall when Abhinav Bindra won the Gold medal for shooting in the recent Olympics, several state Governments individually honored him with prize money totaling to nearly 1.66 crores. For a person highlighting the name of our Country in International forum – we choose to honor. It is good and will be a motivator to several such aspirants. But, one must also think of our soldiers and policemen who brave it each day in the line of duty unflinchingly and take the beating when the fail. Why are these unsung heroes not rewarded in such a fashion? Why don’t the governments take pride in lavishing these living heroes and those that have sacrificed their lives with honour?

I take pride in the fact that “Melur Meadows” a unique gated community project coming up near Coimbatore, chooses to think differently and act practically. We lead by example. We take pride in honoring all war heroes and people from the armed forces, people who serve the nation in the truest sense possible.

www.melurmeadows.com – our website will give you a clear idea about what this unique gated community is all about.

Once a soldier, always a soldier. Strong willed and brave. Conditioned to face any situation, committed to a cause. Most of all dependable and a person who can lead and be looked upon as an Idol or mentor. We would love to have people from the armed forces in our unique gated community so that people are motivated and patriotic. For this very reason, we offer cottages at discounted prices for people from armed forces/ war heroes. We plan to have a mini India. Ours is not about real estate, but about the package of services that come with it. A mini India with people form all walks of life, all parts of India, live together in Unity, harmony and peace. In a safe and secure location.

The pollution free, tranquil atmosphere and not to forget the ideal location near several scenic spots making this an ideal holiday home for all. A simple, laidback lifestyle in a village setting, but with all modern amenities and facilities available within the community. Visit our website and know for your self the true meaning of “CATCHING UP WITH HAPPY LIVING”.

Life at Melur Meadows..

A perfect place to catch up with happy living….
Zipping through the highway en route Melur Meadows, in less than an hour, you would have the enchanting views of natural beauty amidst marvellous natural woods and coconut canopies, ancient temples that pepper the route, pulsating paddy fields sprinkled with enchanting waterways, and canals decked with white lilies. Then, amidst this sylvan surroundings, nestled in a beautiful hamlet get ready to be enthralled by a place where you can hear nothing except quaint and cheerful bird songs and swish of swaying trees and feel nothing except the inescapable joy of being with your loved ones. Melur Meadows is undoubtedly the place you have always dreamt to spend the rest of your life in.

This gated community offers a total of 150 living quarters spread across 9 acres of pristine lands. Comfortably segregated into different styles are Studio Apartments and luxury cottages, satisfying the interests and budget of individual investor with world-class amenities with best in architecture, infrastructure and security. Each abode comes fringed with a kitchenette, bedroom (s), beautifully fitted bathroom, internet cabling, telephone, intercom, TV Cabling.

All residents have access to gym, spa, cafeteria/community kitchen, business center, library, yoga and meditation hall for the spiritually inclined, hobby center, spa, hot tubs, gym, shops, nursing/ medical care, maids and servants, tennis courts, swimming pool, our own animal farm, vegetable and herbal gardens... and you can even indulge in some community service you have been thinking of so long, in the nearby villages and much more… You can have all this at starting prices as low as Rs.10 lacs now.



Elevation of Deluxe Cottages.


A calm location.










Spa

yoga and meditation center

Why are incidents of mental depression & suicide attempts on the rise?

Do you ever stop to think and rejoice about a day of ordinary miracles-Like a fresh pot of coffee that you didn't have to make yourself. An unexpected phone call from an old friend. Green signal lights on your way to work or shop. The fastest line at the grocery store. Your favorite “sing-along” song on the radio. Your keys- right there, on the spot you are looking for it.

These little bite-size pieces of perfection that give you the wondrous feeling that the Lady Luck is smiling at you?

Well, not many of us stop to think of any of these as factors contributing to our happiness. A long queue ahead, we instantly grumble about it , Red traffic signal, and we are at out wits end waiting for the lights to turn green. Car keys missing, we bring the roof down. In everyday life, one can only expect such small disasters to fill in the gaps of our otherwise dull lives. But, the further our civilizations get, the shorter is our fuse or patience. We like everything served on a platter.

Compare the life of a school going child to that of a child about 15-20 years ago. The change we see is remarkable. The present day children live and see life differently. They hardly know the concept of “out in the open – under the blue skies”. We are all crammed into the city with its crowd and pollution. What we call home now-a-days ( tiny bird’s nest sized apartments, high rise buildings) hardly have anything to offer by way of open grounds as play area for children. What ever open spaces are available are used as car parks.
We even teach children that it is safe to stay back home rather than play outside, lest a glass pane gets broken during a game of football or cricket. We see children carrying loads of books to and from school. The pressure to perform is immensely high. Children are made to learn music, freestyle dance, karate, chess, swimming, drawing, paining, tuition classes for their studies and the list goes on. In a 24-hour day except for the 8-9 hours of sleep that a child gets, there is pressure to go from class to class, learn and also be an achiever.

Children 15-20 years ago were vastly at an advantage because, life was less complicated. A child had less choices to make and lesser things to do. 24 hours was a wide expanse of time which would mainly be spent in interactions with other children by way of simple games played with no high-tech toys, but only with bats, balls, dolls etc. Children were less stressed and were worry-free.

Present day children are accustomed to computers, high tech toys, traveling in cars or other motorized vehicles to and from places. Children hardly get an opportunity to stretch their legs except perhaps when they go to attend one class after other. Cell phones, I pods, blue-tooth devices, laptops and the list goes on and on. Children are under peer pressure to own these gadgets or risk being rejected by peers. They in turn, pressurize their parents to acquire these gadgets. The parents now have to find ways and means to earn more to support an every increasing cost of living and to accommodate the never ending wants of their children.

Pressure is what is the driving force of life in cities. It used to be real passion and interest in work, but, not any more. One life time is just not enough in spite of all the luxuries and comforts that are available. People are dissatisfied and disillusioned. They are driven to antidepressants or attempt to take the easy way out – suicide !!

Now we hear of the economic recession in USA and its effect on global economy. Huge financial giants closing shop. Thousands of people losing their jobs daily. People fearing for their livelihood. People having to made-do with cut in salary, perks and other benefits. These nagging uncertainties of life is having a telling effect on the health of people. Not all people are able to brave these sudden misfortunes thrust upon them. Hypertension is on the rise and people with floundering health conditions pass on their insecurities, unhealthy life-style and declining health conditions to their children.

Children are the worst affected in case of financial crisis as they fail to adapt to the magnitude of its effects on their suddenly altered lifestyle. Poor health, failing concentration, pressure to perform and get ahead – these are the mantras that rule the lives of the present generation.

Just like a silver lining behind a cloud, new vistas in real estate, housing and alternative lifestyle are emerging. Very few builders consider people as creatures requiring more than mere 4-walls and box-like living rooms. For mental and physical wellbeing the solution lies in our surroundings and environment. Few real estate people really appreciate the value of peace, calm and quite an environment totally void of pollution, a surrounding offering pristine mountain breeze, clear open skies and greenery all round.

Melur Meadows is one such gated community emerging near Coimbatore. It is located at the foothills of the Nilgiris and is calm and quite. Melur Meadows is unique because it offers to its buyers a range of cottages to choose from and a variety of amenities and facilities which, you could only expect to find in resorts. The best feature of this project being its affordability. Keeping in mind the what the present-day city dweller lacks and what can fulfill his needs, Melur Meadows is a green retreat, and as a topping on the cake, Melur Meadows offer property management services to its buyers. Which means, when you are unable to occupy your cottage, they offer to take care of the rentals, housekeeping and total property management.

Visit www.melurmeadows.com for full details about this awesome gated community. One of its kind in South India

Can a city dweller have Green dreams ?

Many people find gardening an incredibly relaxing hobby. A hobby that allows them to get in touch with the earth and themselves. Likewise, gardening is not an expensive hobby to start, although the hobby may become expensive as you progress in the art of planting. Needless to say, thousands of people enjoy gardening each year and if you are fond of the outdoors, you may find yourself interested in gardening too.
You won't need much to start gardening. Some basic tools like a shovel, a rake, and hoe may do you well in the garden. You will need either seeds or starter plants, whichever you prefer. But, how does one actually become an expert at it? Well, gardening comes naturally to us humans as we have nurtured and and used plants from time immemorial for our own use and benefits. Still, it helps list out the following before we actually venture into large scale gardening...

What is your budget? It could start from as little as Rs.10/- to thousands of Rupees depending upon the following...

1.Is it indoor / outdoor or terrace gardening that you are venturing into
(a) If it is indoor – what sort of time are you willing to devote each day. If you lead a busy life with much of you time spent away from home, the choice of indoor plants must be made wisely and the plants inside the house must also be located strategically to take in most of the natural lighting available from windows or the balcony.
(b) If it is window boxes that you desire – on the sill of your bedroom/ kitchen windows, you will once again have to choose your plants wisely and also have iron brackets installed to hold the plant box you desire to install.
(c) If it is terrace gardening you plan to do, (a) would it be on a large scale with soil and lawn all over the terrace or potted plants placed in rows on the terrace.
2.If you are lucky enough to have a patch of land where you can have a garden, then what is the amount of open space or soil space you have?
3.What sort of gardening venture are you getting into – something that will yield fruit or vegetables soon after planting, or something that will take time to grow and bear fruit – like fruit trees.
4.Having decided this, one must take into consideration the climate prevalent at the place and the soil type.

I am a city dweller, and even though I have an immense desire to garden, I am unable to do so because of the following factors like space constraints (I live in an apartment), rules laid out by the flat association, necessity for conservation of water, objections that may be raised by other residents, etc. For example, I cannot put up anything on the terrace, such as a small shade to protect my plants from direct sunlight, as it is against the association rules.
These things, trivial though they may be, ensure that my dream garden remains a dream and nothing more, at least for now. I, however, intend to have a garden no matter what happens, even if it means having to wait till my husband retires. But then, even after retirement, WHERE?
I think the solution lies in self-sufficient gated communities in rural areas, with cottage-type residences coupled with resort-like facilities one looks for in today's world. One such dream getaway is 'Melur Meadows', a safe, secure, tranquil, peaceful and pollution-free colony near Coimbatore, Tamil Nadu. I came across their website www.melurmeadows.com. Upon going through I was impressed by the various options that ones gets. The best part is that it is so affordable that one can go in for a cottage and let the company's property management scheme take care of the letting out, taxes, rentals etc and we could visit it as a holiday getaway whenever we have a holiday. It is just awesome. I am glad such alternative lifestyles are available at affordable costs.
If you're wondering what this community has to do with gardening, then here's the answer. Melur Meadows gives each of its residents their own garden patch, where they can grow absolutely anything they want! There will be garden festivals, gardening competitions and displays! Oh what fun. I cant wait to get there. The community starts full-fledged by December 2009.
I urge like-minded people to visit the website and find out for themselves. Think of what you could do, provided with your own garden patch... Isn't it a dream come true for sore city-accustomed eyes?
Think about it!!

Which part of India is mine?

The title may sound a little far fetched, but that is a fact of life for several people. People who are government employees, bank employees, basically people with transferable jobs.

Take Ramesh's family for instance. Mr. Ramesh works for the ONGC. His family comprises of his wife, three children, his aged mother and a widowed elder sister. ONGC is an organization that has wide spread operations in different locations of India. Families like Mr.Ramesh's cannot afford to grow roots in any one part of India by virtue of the transferable nature of the job.

Mr. Ramesh's children have greatly benefited from the Central schools spread out all over the nation. His eldest daughter Rupa is married and settled in USA. His son, Rohit is in his final year of college while his youngest daughter, Reshma is still schooling. From the open expanses and greenery of Assam, they have recently been posted in Chennai. Allocation of office living quarters is always a mixed bag - you can only hope to get a decent livable house. It has its own charm yet, its own disadvantages.

Mrs. Renuka Ramesh wistfully wishes to have her own little cottage where she can call the four walls and surrounding garden her own. Where she can have her choicest color of tiles, design her own modular kitchen and have a garden she can tend to. Having been a home maker, caring for her ailing mother-in-law and her temperamental sister-in-law has left her craving for some respite from the routine chores of cooking cleaning, care giving and nurturing her children.

Mr. Ramesh is due for retirement in two years. He has been to several parts of India by virtue of his job. He now asks - I belong to India "part and parcel", but which part of India belongs to me? His predicament is- a final settling place that will suit all of his family members.

A peaceful place that would provide for Mr. Ramesh- an easy relaxed lifestyle, mingling with like-minded people who like community service. For his mother, who could do with daily care giving from a trained nurse and his widowed elder sister who would do well with regular yoga and meditation. His wife who could do with a variety of activities such as conducting cookery classes,teaching and learning craft work, and NOT getting bogged down with daily cooking and house keeping. She needs "time" to call her own when she can do the things she wants at her own pace.

All this sounded too far fetched, as a place housing all these facilities, yet being affordable, in a peaceful and tranquil location having a good cool climate sounds like asking for the moon...

Well, not really, there is actually such a place near Coimbatore. It is a unique gated community called Melur Meadows. The website www.melurmeadows.com gives all details.

I would like your take on "Gated Communities" such as the above. Do you think it is a welcome addition to the already existing real estate boom happening all around?
Your valuable comments please....

Nuclear families - is it the norm or a choice

From the time I've been around ( not that I am very ancient), but long enough to see the changes happening in family settings especially in the middle classes.

Talking of Chennai, the city has changed, progressed and has come a long way since I was a kid. It now is truly deserving of the title 'Metro city". The slums continue to be there, the dumps, pollution and crowds have only increased, but the change I see now, is in the residents- their attitude.

Having said that, what I saw as a kid was houses full of people. Every household would have grandparents, sometimes, uncles and aunts thrown in as well. It used to be a matter of shame not to have a grandparent around to tell you mythological stories every night. Few of my friends who were deprived, were a miserable lot and would shy away with a complex for not having grandparents, uncles and aunts around.

As I grew up, it was thought to be very wrong if people chose to live as a nuclear family without additional tags of their parents, brothers or sisters. The daughter-in-laws were termed "house breakers" for trying to lure their husbands away and start living in their own terms and conditions. Many such "bahus" were shunned and were thought to be a bad example to other girls ( both unwed and wedded ones). Their freedom and lifestyle was envied by many. I have heard my mother and other aunts discuss among themselves about those lucky ladies who knew how to steer their husbands away from interfering in-laws. The new found financial freedom and unfettered lifestyle, no customs and rituals to be followed as per family norms, the freedom to choose to spend your money and leisure the way you like and most of all having a say in the way you want your children brought up - these were the positives tilting the heavy points pro nuclear family. Women were starting to get assertive and found this freedom gave them the opportunity to explore new vistas of life. It was not just the women, but also the men. It is a well known fact that "Happier a woman is, the less complicated will be a man's life". A satisfied woman is capable of taking care of her entire family ( her man included) very well and keep them happy too. This suited the men as, all they want is a simple, uncomplicated life so they can get on with their pet projects.

With the advent of this widely accepted new lifestyle, people don't find a nuclear family as something peculiar or new. On the contrary, if you come across a joint family, that would be termed as peculiar under the present living situation. People refuse to compromise on their freedom and space and are quite open about it. Most of the present generation ( who themselves are byproducts of nuclear families) have no understanding of a joint family and its significance.

This again, I feel is because of the financial independence and the luxuries that one can afford with the money. An acquaintance of mine, a modern woman who works full time, with a 3 kids , believes that she can be truly happy only when she is in-charge and runs the family the way she desires. She prefers to hire a cook and two maids for house work rather than have her in-laws around. She is unwilling to share her territory. Now, who am I or you to judge her? She finds comfort in ruling the roost in her kingdom. While her mother-in-law laments having lost her son to a possessive witch.

The most recent trend that I am noticing now is the great demand for parents to play the role of grand parents!! Young married couples now realize that their children are safe when taken care of by their own grandparents and they also stand to gain a lot by this. No extra salary for baby sitting. The parents double up as cleaners and cooks also. Parents also unflinchingly go ahead and help out when ever they can. Its because of the boundless love and affection that they have towards their children that the parents go abroad to foreign lands and serve their kids.

A neighbouring family of mine an old man-aged 78 and his wife aged around 73. They do their regular rounds to the USA to help out their daughter and son with their small children. Each time after VISA period is over they return to India. When they breath the air here and meet with their siblings, kith and kin, they find incredible joy. When they go to live with their children, they describe it as a a luxurious life, but within a "golden cage", a "cage" nevertheless. They get all the luxuries, get to visit new places etc. but their freedom is severely curbed. Once back in India, they are independent and go about visiting people and places as they please.

It is in this context that I am now seeing several senior people preferring a gated community or retirement home, where they can be secure and mix with like minded people. They make plans and go on jolly trips, pilgrimages and have lot of fun doing activities they love doing, pursuing their hobbies etc. There are a few such places in India, that offer these things in totality and are really as good as they claim to be. One such place that is coming up is Melur Meadows - a gated community near Coimbatore. I learnt about this in their web site www.melurmeadows.com Upon further inquiry, i have come to know of some of my NRI friends who have gone in for a property for their parents to stay when in India. It is more or less like a resort with community kitchen, medicare, hobby centre, gym, spa, swimming pools and so much more and the company lets it out on rent when the owners are not occupying it.

I would like to know your opinion on such communities that are cropping up in India. Is independent living good for old people? Are they happier when they are in their mother land, living among like-minded people, their siblings and friends? Are they not supposed to be living with their own children whether they are in India or abroad? Are seniors happy when they have the freedom and mobility to do what they like, when they like? What is your take on this?

An Alternate Lifestyle - semi retirement

An alternative lifestyle is a lifestyle generally perceived to be outside the cultural norm, a decision to substitute another approach or not enter the usual expected path in most societies. ( Wikipedia).

We can now choose to be part of a special community and lead an alternative lifestyle. I came across this concept when I came across a web site called www.melurmeadows.com . They call it " catch up with happy living".

The property being offered there is different in the sense that it comes as a package. One does not end up with a house made of bricks and cement alone, but is wedded to a beautifully conceived idea of a community where people live in a village like setting because of the tranquility and pollution free atmosphere, at the same time enjoy all the benefits of a modern lifestyle - right from security systems, cafeteria, internet, gym, spa, swimming pools etc etc.

I found this really fascinating, especially since I live in a metro city where living space is congested, everywhere I go there is pollution and crowd, I yearn for a place where I can just relax under the shade of a tree where the gentle breeze, there is lush green grass, birds chirping and no other disturbing sounds of zooming cars, blaring horns, vendors selling their wares loudly, nearby temples having their yearly fest with loud speakers and most of all the FM radio that keeps playing from the most unlikely of sources.

So far, except inside the theosophical society grounds, there is continues din and noise. So, When I read about this place nestled near the foothills of Nilgirls which is going to have 1 acre area exclusively for landscaped lawns and parks and two large lilly ponds and hundreds of trees and healthy mountain breeze from the Nilgiris and tucked miles and miles away from any sort of pollution and noise..and cottages interspersed amidst all this in 8 acres of prestine land... this sounds heavenly to me.

I'd like to know what your take is on this. Do keep me posted. I am seriously considering settling in a place like above. How about you?


What do you think of living in a place where you will have an active community life meeting and mingling with like-minded people, doing what you want to do at your own pace, relaxing in a hammok with books you always wanted to read, doing community work and feel you are doing your bit for the nation, having fun and frolic with a variety of activities that the community itself houses also the events manager to help organize fun events and fests, plus the best aspect of it all, living with your kith and kin in adjacent or nearby cottages so that you can once again relive your childhood, growing up with our siblings. The seniors are to be housed in an enclave of their own which will consist of a cluster of cottages, so that they can mingle with their age group and also with youngsters when they want to.

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